When I think about my disadvantages; growing up in a single parent home, going through parental divorce, getting hooked on drugs (sober now for two years and some months), some say being black in America, not many role models, being an ex-con, starting out at age 41, being in a transition home, my father dying, and being diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder (I am medicated daily for it), I feel as if there is nothing else that can go wrong. But, since I was a child I’ve been enhanced by the Christian belief system that never gives up on the disadvantage life. God with His infinite power, strength, and courage continues to empower me to never give up.

I feel as if the time in jail has bettered my vision of how focused I should be on living life. A little before, and during my time in jail I was very suicidal. Although I’ve never did anything close to trying to kill myself, I had this uncontrollable urge to kill myself there. I don’t know where it came from, but I had already planned out how I would do it upon getting out of jail. I was going to drown myself in a lake at a local park. But, something saved me as I was on the verge of homelessness…I was invited to take part in a transition home program with Apalachee Center (The Apalachee Center in Tallahassee, FL, is a behavioral health care organization providing services for individuals and families struggling with mental health, substance abuse, and co-occurring disorders). It was at Apalachee Centers Hospital that I was found to be suffering with Major Depressive Disorder. This changed my medicine, and mentally put me on track to success. The suicidal thoughts are gone, and I’m now free and sober to live my life on my terms.

As I continue to look at my life’s entirety up until this point, education has always been my backbone, and I believe reading is fundamental to my success in whatever I choose to do from now on. I have to learn from people not around me. I learn from people whose not walked a day in my shoes to learn something I didn’t know to acknowledge. These pioneers have begun to give me hope in such a way to give me ideas of how to fully be successful in whatever I do (innovation and entrepreneurship). I look at these people as monuments to sit and observe to gather my thoughts of reason as to the choices, decisions, ideals, and appropriateness within me…I’ve learned from my mistakes or disadvantages. The most important take away is that I can’t blame other people for my lack of drive. I am driven by what I put forth into the universe and to creation. I’ve learned that my thoughts matter…maybe not to the people around me, but to someone I’ve never met before and somehow knows my story from beginning to end. I am determined to succeed! I don’t look at my past as my only solution, but I look at my past as the resolution nobody will ever write for me because I didn’t let my past define me. Instead I’ll let my disadvantages catapult me to innovation and entrepreneurship in it’s rarest form; brilliant!